Calcification, revisited
May. 16th, 2007 11:12 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
furtechI once made a post about “calcification”. This is the transition of a person from having a fannish sense-of-wonder to a mundane with only a sense-of-rent (or kids or work). The “wonder” disappears. I just had an LJ exchange with a good friend about this. Here's my distilled version.
For those of you old enough to have friends in their 30’s+, try to remember those people back in college or high school who would once say, “Sure, I’d love to go to the comic store with you!” and who—years later—would look at you as if you just turned into dog-poop and say, “Why?!”
That’s calcification.
Calcification is the transition of former fans, artists and creative-types into people who have lost that sense of wonder-- the need to be creative. Most people eventually leave all that behind and become everyday men and women with jobs, kids and a happy --if mundane-- life. There was a time when I just could not understand how anyone could let that happen to them. Since then I've learned that it's not an active choice-- just something that happens. Other things have a higher priority and eventually they just forget about things like art and music. I've got a few very good friends who are heading down this path and while I'm sad to see them go, at least they're happy and unaware and busy entering a new phase of their lives. Likely we’ll see less and less of each other as the different priorities come with different friends.
Some people fight it, some go with the flow. Ultimately the question that needs to be addressed is: are you happy? Creativity is not a requisite for happiness. Personally, I could see myself drifting away from fandom/costuming/comics and into dog training-- an activity that is fun and can fill your free time if you let it.
Am I happy?
That's the rub: happiness is -very- subjective. People who are happy and lead ordinary lives -are- happy (let's ignore the ones who pretend they're happy). The calcification process is slow and subtle-- priorities change and you transition into another lifestyle. This doesn't mean you no longer do fun or creative things—in fact, you will shine when given the opportunity to be creative (decorating a cake for kids, office party themes, posters for fundraising booths, etc.).
I'm not saying that this transition from weird to mundane would make -me- happy: that's why I still fight it. But it can happen and it's neither good nor bad, just different.
To use a slightly different take: I look at the number of people who used to do art or take walks or DO stuff in the real world who now spend those hours happily playing WoW or Second Life. Those people are happy...they no longer do (or have cut down drastically) things that I believe are more worthwhile (walk, art, etc.), but they're not living for -my- happiness, so if they're happy that's that. None of them made a conscious decision to spend hours zombifying themselves in front of a computer and stop doing “real life” things, but they started playing and it was fun and soon that playing became more important than those things they used to spend that time doing.
For those of you old enough to have friends in their 30’s+, try to remember those people back in college or high school who would once say, “Sure, I’d love to go to the comic store with you!” and who—years later—would look at you as if you just turned into dog-poop and say, “Why?!”
That’s calcification.
Calcification is the transition of former fans, artists and creative-types into people who have lost that sense of wonder-- the need to be creative. Most people eventually leave all that behind and become everyday men and women with jobs, kids and a happy --if mundane-- life. There was a time when I just could not understand how anyone could let that happen to them. Since then I've learned that it's not an active choice-- just something that happens. Other things have a higher priority and eventually they just forget about things like art and music. I've got a few very good friends who are heading down this path and while I'm sad to see them go, at least they're happy and unaware and busy entering a new phase of their lives. Likely we’ll see less and less of each other as the different priorities come with different friends.
Some people fight it, some go with the flow. Ultimately the question that needs to be addressed is: are you happy? Creativity is not a requisite for happiness. Personally, I could see myself drifting away from fandom/costuming/comics and into dog training-- an activity that is fun and can fill your free time if you let it.
Am I happy?
That's the rub: happiness is -very- subjective. People who are happy and lead ordinary lives -are- happy (let's ignore the ones who pretend they're happy). The calcification process is slow and subtle-- priorities change and you transition into another lifestyle. This doesn't mean you no longer do fun or creative things—in fact, you will shine when given the opportunity to be creative (decorating a cake for kids, office party themes, posters for fundraising booths, etc.).
I'm not saying that this transition from weird to mundane would make -me- happy: that's why I still fight it. But it can happen and it's neither good nor bad, just different.
To use a slightly different take: I look at the number of people who used to do art or take walks or DO stuff in the real world who now spend those hours happily playing WoW or Second Life. Those people are happy...they no longer do (or have cut down drastically) things that I believe are more worthwhile (walk, art, etc.), but they're not living for -my- happiness, so if they're happy that's that. None of them made a conscious decision to spend hours zombifying themselves in front of a computer and stop doing “real life” things, but they started playing and it was fun and soon that playing became more important than those things they used to spend that time doing.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-05-17 12:23 am (UTC)Its interesting you bring this topic up- Since my reply to the previous had these thoughts running through my head- mostly about myself.
I DONT do things like I used to--- and it does depress me a lot.
There are so many 'promises' of projects to come- dreams of new things to make and I never get around to it.
Work has been a major factor. I spend 10 hours away from home- when I get home I dont feel like doing anything at all :( Not even my most dear of interests. Much less any of them that might actually require any significant quantity of effort :P
As for going out-- always like to do it if it doesnt mean a long drive anymore. Go back 3 years ago, even if it meant a trip to North Carolina, I was like totally for it--- now even cons dont interest me so much if it means a long drive (But then, I'm pretty sick of driving 2 hours a day too).
Now, I said all of that to say that whats really sad is that I seem to be getting more and more 'conditioned' to this life style. I dont want to, and yet its happening year by year. I work more, and actually DO less. *grumble*
So-- projects that are REALLY work intensive... like 1/8th scale steam locomotives and Tora suits, have totally fallen off the radar screen... I'm left with only my own boastful words of "I'm going to build _____" that echo in my head, that rub my nose in the fact that I said I would, and I havent, and at this rate I probably wont in my lifetime.
"Calcification", if indeed it is what you feel I am experiencing, to me is feeling more like rigor mortis! :/
no subject
Date: 2007-05-17 06:59 am (UTC)The big problem is not noticing when it's happening...at least you are still aware and still make an effort to get neat stuff done. Kind of like what I'm doing now: gotta fight for the time to do fun stuff. I finally cleared my plate of immediate work-stuff, so now I can work on a few costume projects! Woo!